Do you ever feel ill?
by checkmate416
Summary: Kaldur feels insecure about being Team leader, but there's no time to brood because he has to mind Thomas (OC). Kaldur might be a little OOC.


Thomas is my OC and this story is a sequel to "Team, Watch Thomas".

Kaldur and Thomas share a moment.

MOUNT JUSTICE 10:30 EST

The gilled teen sat in the green couch staring at the earthen ceiling. His brow was furrowed and his blue eyes were troubled.

 _Am I really qualified for such an important position as "team leader"? Why did they think I was the best choice? The better question is, why did I accept? I'm the oldest, I should have known...I'm not fit to lead a team of any sort. Yes. I will tell Robin he must..._

He was jolted out of his intropsection by peripheral movement.

"I am sorry Thomas, I was distracted. Are you alright?" he asked the child before him.

Thomas was four years old, but he was terribly underweight. He did not eat, sleep or play.

Kaldur had to watch him while the rest of the Team was out on a mission. Initially, he resented the task. It was baby-sitting. But lately, he did not even feel he was qualified to do even _that._

The blond child stared straight into the gilled teen's blue eyes. Kaldur shuddered slightly, though he was somewhat relieved.

When the child did not answer, he said, "I am very happy that you are making eye contact with me. The Question will be happy as well when I tell him later today."

Despite feeling torn up inside, Kaldur was able to manage a friendly smile. To his surprise, the child returned one of his own. Kaldur could not help but laugh softly at the progress out of sheer joy.

Suddenly...

"Do you ever feel ill?" Thomas asked.

Kaldur's eyes widened slightly. "...Do I ever... feel ill...?"

"Yes."

 _What an odd question. Is he trying to engage in conversation with me? I should play along. Everyone will be pleased to hear about his progress. But where could he be going with th-_

"Mr. Kaldur?"

"Please, just call me Kaldur. Well, the short answer is, yes, I do feel sick sometimes."

"Yes, but, do you ever feel _ill?"_

 _Sick and ill are basically the same thing, but I should continue to play along..._

"I do."

"What do you do to make yourself feel better?" The child would not break eye contact. His eyes had dark circles under them. Although Kaldur knew why the young child had them, all he could think when he saw them was _senseless._

"I get plenty of rest and try to relax. Why do you ask? Are you feeling ill, Thomas?"

"Yes."

"Why didn't you say so earlier? Come, your medicine is in the cupboard-"

"Wait a second please, " said Thomas, closing the three foot space between them by a step.

"What's wrong?"

"Mr. Kaldur, why can't I rest to feel better when I'm sick?" The pain in his eyes broke the young Atlantean's heart.

"That's what your medicine is for, Thomas. Your body is very sick, but it is okay. Many people are working very hard right now to make a medicine that will heal it. It is o-"

"But Mr. Kaldur, why do I need medicine?"

"You need medicine to feel better. But that is completely fine. Everyone needs medicine sometimes. And remember, you can call me Ka-"

"But I need medicine all the time. I just want to sleep." Thomas hung his head.

Silence pierced the room. _Poseidon, I beg you to help this child, if it is your will._

"... I know it must be very hard for you. I cannot imagine what you are going through. I wish I could do more to help, but all I can do is give you medicine that will help a little. Come, let's go to the kitchen to get it."

From his seat on the couch, Kaldur slowly extended a hand to the child. But Thomas only stared at him.

After a couple seconds, Kaldur felt...open and vulnerable. Even on missions, he had never experienced such feelings.

Then again, he had never been on a mission that involved a scrawny sleep and food-deprived toddler staring into his soul.

He was just about to try to verbally coax him again, but then the child began again,

"How long have I been here? How long have these acts of human depravity been allowed to continue? Should I continue? Should I continue to follow this path set for me, or write my own story? Should I continue to abuse these meaningless acts of self-hate? Have I experienced an ego death and transcended beyond a human mind and being? No, that's not possible, I am still forming human thoughts and sentences that any man could understand. Can anyone hear this?

I've lost all feeling, but somehow I still know that I am feeling. I feel a repetitive dreadful vibe every time I step outside of this motel room. Maybe I should continue to exist here and make it my existential domain. I have everything I could ever need. I am a god to my people. I show mercy where it is fit and fury where it is necessary. My people will never disobey me, they will follow me into the ether with no second guesses. Mindless drones, foaming at the mouth for the opportunity to serve something they don't understand. Something they will never understand. Do I even understand? Or have I deluded myself into thinking I am the only one who understands? What is there to understand?

These questions haunt me, sinking into my brain like quicksand. Count to 3, one two three. Now count to 5, one two three four five. Inhale, then exhale. There is nothing wrong. Everything has always been right. You were never meant to worry, never meant to be scared. Yet here you are, scared like a child who's lost his mother at the supermarket. Wake up, go to work, come home, make dinner, cry, go to sleep, wake up, go to work. When was the last time something was beautiful? When was the last time something was so beautiful it made you feel unimportant and useless? I want to love. I want to feel. Help. Help me. Help. The walls are closing in and suffocating me also tabasco flavored cheez Its are fucking amazing, I could eat a box and a half in one sitting and not even give a toot. What are you thinking? Do you think? Are you just a figment of my imagination. Is all of this a dream? If I am god why do I not recall creating the universe?

I am the star-child. I have transcended. It burns when I pee. Please stop the pee pee burn. Why do my pee pee burn? Please help my pee pee is like fire. Twinks will rule the earth and it will be mandatory to listen their indie/shoegaze albums on bandcamp. Can't wait to hear another song about how you have to get away or how you still love that one girl from highschool, but now you're 24 and it's getting kind of pathetic. Beep boop bop my pee pee still burns. I hold the tip of my penis in agony oh god why the pee pee burn? Why oh why the pee pee burn? The packers are looking good to win the superbowl this year. Touch-down hailmarry buy bud light and punch your wife then drive home and flip your Chevy truck into a ditch and burn alive.

Throw the ol' pigskin with your son who you never loved and never wanted to have in the first place. He will grow up and drink twice as much bud light as you. He will go to coachella each year annually and trip mdma and acid till he feels like a color. The color purple. He will come out to you as a transgender furry and you will masturbate to the thought in secret. Flip a coin. Make a decision. Should you buy the new 4k resolution Xbox or PS4? Shovel shit into your mouth until you cum. Why does it burn when I cum? Please help the cum burn send me an email on how to stop the pee pee and cum burn. Pee pee burn why why help me with pee pee burn my pee pee should not burn why my pee pee burn help my poor burning pee pee. "

There was absolute silence throughout Mount Justice.

When Kaldur came to, an inch from his face were two wide brown bloodshot eyes with unsightly dark circles under them.

He instinctively pushed back on his heels, throwing his back into the couch.

As his heart raced, he realized that his right arm ached. It had remained extended and was now filled with lactic acid.

Thomas had closed the three foot space between them and now had a bored expression on his gaunt little face.

Kaldur finally recovered and said "You will have your medicine right now," and he picked up the child and held him close and headed to the kitchen rather hurriedly.

Thomas, his head resting on the Atlantean's shoulder, was faced with something he knew did not belong on a normal person.

Without, hesitation, he extended his little tongue and licked its outer part as well as its inner part.

Kaldur shuddered violently at the feeling of the moist digit invading his gills.

 _Poseidon, please let the Team return very soon._

 **A/N:** Thomas' little monologue is from a youtube video called "Motel Man".


End file.
